3 Tips to Transform your Relationship with Self Doubt

So, let's talk a little bit about self-doubt.

I would be willing to make the argument that self-doubt is a HUMAN condition, and everyone at some point in their life, has experienced it. You know, that moment of over-analyzing, overthinking, second-guessing - blah blah blah.

You see, our brains are WIRED for survival, and to avoid threats. We have some very old brains, that are wired to protect us and AVOID any potential threat at all costs. In fact, our survival was once contingent upon this.

The problem is, if you are living in a society with an i-Phone and a Starbucks around the corner, odds are you no longer need to rely this heavily on your brain to "protect" you. In fact, that part of our brain that thinks it's protecting us is often paralyzing us with self-doubt.

The problem is not self-doubt - the problem is our relationship to it, and how easily we give in to that little bugger. 

So, if we all experience self-doubt BECAUSE our brains are wired this way, how do we overcome it? How do we get out of that loop? 

We change our relationship with self doubt


Step 1) Honor the self doubt

This may seem a little counter-intuitive right? Like, you may be saying, "listen Meg, I am trying to GET RID of self-doubt, not compliment it here."

Well, some wise soul at my yoga community told me "what we resist -persists." & although that can be hard to hear when every muscle in our body is resisting a certain yoga pose, it is so damn true. The moment we give in, surrender, and get present is the moment we reclaim inner peace.

BOOM! and just like that, so much of my life clicked for me.

So, here is what I offer to you.

Self-doubt is nothing more than an indicator of you continuing to GROW and EXPAND. Self-doubt indicates you are living in the stretch, and pushing yourself to explore new parts of yourself or new paths for yourself. Welcome it, and honor it for showing you how you're growing as a human. 

When it arrives, BREATHE into it.


Step 2) Flip the Script

Instead of indulging in the self-doubting thoughts (that are no longer serving you) why don't you try this on (either if you catch yourself in the moment, or journal on this after the fact)

"I had a self-doubting thought that....

___[pick your poision here (i.e. I'm not good enough, I need to be more educated, I've never made that much before, etc.)]___

While I see that my primitive brain is just trying to protect me, I want to choose a different story for myself

that I am ___[claim it! claim that bad ass part of yourself that needs to be woken up - (i.e. I am strong and capable, I am a creator, I am beyond capable, I've already done it in my imagination - the rest will flow as it should)]___

Step 3) Look at the Pattern

When you are experiencing self-doubt - is there a typical story/mental soundtrack you are telling yourself?

If you are serious about transforming your relationship with self-doubt then journal on this:

What is coming up for you/what stories do you tell yourself when you are experiencing self-doubt? In what ways has this prohibited you from living your most powerful life? 

I will share mine to give you an idea of what this might look like.

My mental tape I've worked through is when I experience self-doubt it's often because I'm telling myself that people don't want to hear what I have to say. Because of this, I spent many years closed off, intentionally not sharing vulnerably with people. Today i continue to heal this soundtrack, and because I am aware of it I can face it head on in present moments.

It's important to recognize these stories we tell ourselves, and how they have often been playing unconsciously for most of our lives (my story developed around the age of 8).

When we wake up to these stories we have been telling ourselves, we wake up to the fact that something else could be true, and we can wake up to choosing again.

All my love,